To strive, to seek, to find…

Johnson - or to give him his full name, Boris LOL!!!! what a legernd!! Johnson!!! - is a TV character loved by millions for his cheeky, bumbling persona. Unlike the cartoon MP, he’s magnetically prone to scandal, but this somehow only makes him more adorable each time. Tee hee! Boris has had an affair! Arf! Now he’s offended the whole of Liverpool! Crumbs! He used the word “picaninnies”! Yuk yuk! He’s been caught on tape agreeing to give the address of a reporter to a friend who wants him beaten up! Ho ho! Look at his funny blond hair! HA HA BORIS LOL!!!! WHAT A LEGERND!!!!!!

Thank you Mr Brooker.

And why? Because he is a cartoon character. He is not real and he does not exist. Voting him in would be quite a lot like voting in a giant haystack that’s had elocution lessons.

Beej has promised to “beef up” health services in London. The last time someone said that, P.G. Wodehouse gasped and said, “How quaint! I really must put that in one of my books.” Boz has also threatened to “fight for a lasting legacy for London; the after-effects of the Olympics must be felt for decades.” He thinks “Congestion has now risen above pre-Congestion Charge levels.” Do you need more?! Okay then…

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Gotta love Berlinale comments.

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This is crying out to be made into a hard-hitting, occasionally lightened by humorous comic moments, documentary. Or a really boring Bond film:

Council uses criminal law to spy on school place applicants

· Couple’s anger over surveillance admission
· Officials accused of playing James Bond

The authority said it had used such “physical surveillance” on six occasions under RIPA, which allows councils to carry out surveillance only if they suspect serious crimes, including terrorism.

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From today’s Gorkana mailout:

The Independent / The Independent on Sunday
Roger Alton has now been confirmed as the new Editor of The Independent. Roger, formerly Editor of The Observer, will replace Simon Kelner, who will become the Managing Director of both The Independent and The Independent on Sunday. Simon will replace Terry Grote who will retire next month after nine years of running The Independent and The Independent on Sunday titles.

After the jump, a little taster of what’s in store for The Indie:

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I’ve been hard at work, me.

Extraordinary Rendition, which first caught Netribution’s attention ahead of its premiere at last year’s Edinburgh festival, is due to be released on DVD on 28th April, and broadcast on the BBC in the same week.

Suchandrika Chakrabarti met up with director Jim Threapleton and producer Andy Noble, childhood friends turned filmmaking collaborators, to get an update on the improvised film’s editing and innovative distribution, as well as to discover what “the opposite of documentary” means…

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 Chortle.

This was on March 6th. More on them here (turn your speakers down. Or up, if you’re not at work. Lucky you).

Edited on my phone! Thanks to my supporting artists, Will, Brian and Joe.

Thanks to Gawker for this…

Famous Writers as Children

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The FIPRESCI team found a much better picture for this article than I did…

“I’m just a twat from Leytonstone,” says Damon Albarn in the documentary BANANAZ (Ceri Levy, UK, 2008), which had its world premiere last night in Panorama Dokumente. The quote is typical of the film’s filthy, silly humour, which also encompasses a giant penis and fart gags. BANANAZ is able to take such an intimate look at its subject, the animated band Gorillaz, thanks to the director’s friendship with the group. It is this quality that was missing, or felt manufactured, in Martin Scorsese’s Rolling Stones pop promo, SHINE A LIGHT (USA/UK, 2008), which opened this year’s Berlinale.

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